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Will You Survive the Apocalypse?

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The definitive survey of your survival skills. Will you make it through an apocalypse? Find out now.
FIND OUT NOW! ⧐ ⧐
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First up, what should we call you?

OK
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Have you survived an apocalypse before, %%FIRST%%?
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Yes
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No
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Is the apocalypse you survived COVID-19?
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Yes
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No
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Were you hospitalized for COVID-19?
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Yes
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No
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Do you have at least 5 gallons of bottled water easily accessible?
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Yes, I have at least 5 gallons of bottled water easily accessible.
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No, I don’t have enough bottled water accessible
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I have limitless water available in the faucet, so I don’t need bottled water
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Do you own a bug-out bag?
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What’s a bug-out bag?
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I think so
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Yes, and I can reach it in 30 seconds
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Yes, somewhere around here
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No, I don't yet have one
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How many of the following items are in your bug-out bag?
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-emergency blanket

-signal mirror

-flint and steel

-tinder

-stormproof matches

-paracord

-a multipurpose knife

-fire starter

-a can opener

-an eating utensil

-water filtration straw

-shoes

0-3 of these items are in my bug-out bag
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4-6 of these items are in my bug-out bag
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7-10 of these items are in my bug-out bag
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11-12 of these items are in my bug-out bag
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Do you have a pair of shoes in your bug-out bag?
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Yes
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No
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I don't need shoes in my bug-out bag
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Do you have superpowers?
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Yes
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No
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What is your primary superpower?
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Invincibility
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Superstrength
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Superspeed
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Elasticity
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Supersight
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Able to Fly
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Ability to control nature
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Other
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How did you get your superpower?
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I’m not permitted to say
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Radiation or natural physical phenomenon
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Biological vector (like insect bite)
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Lab accident
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Research experiment (pill, injection, device)
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Do you have a belt in Krav Maga?
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Yes
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No
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Not a belt, but I’ve trained in Krav Maga
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Have you been professionally certified in the use of firearms for work or hunting?
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Yes
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Yes, I trained for special forces (SEALs, Green Beret, etc)
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No
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Have you ever slaughtered and gutted an animal for food?
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Yes, a four-legged animal
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Yes, a fish or bird
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No, I don’t like to kill animals
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Would you call yourself a person of faith?
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Yes
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No
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Not really
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Do you pray?
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Yes, to Allah
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Yes, to the Jewish God
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Yes, to the Christian God
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Yes, to another god, goddess, or gods
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No
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Are you intentional about your faith?
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Yes, I apply my faith to my daily life.
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Yes, but not as much as I wish.
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No. My faith and lifestyle are not connected.
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Do you have any zombie-fighting skills?
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Yes
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No
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Which do you have a belt in?
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Karate
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Taekwondo or Aikido
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Judo
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Brazilian Jiu-jitsu
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Kickboxing
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My drawer or closet
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Can you strike a target by throwing a knife?
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Yes, from quite a distance
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Yes, if I’m close to the target
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Nope
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Can you hit a target by throwing an axe?
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Yes, from quite a distance
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No, I’m terrible at axe throwing
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No, I’ve never tried to hit a target with an axe
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Do you own a gun?
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Yes
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No
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No, and I'm against guns
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Do you have a stockpile of ammo for your gun?
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Yes
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No, it’s hard to find ammo
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One bullet is enough
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Do you know how to handle and shoot a gun?
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I’ve never handled a gun, but shooting a gun is easy. Point and shoot.
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Yes, I can handle a gun, but am a bad shot
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Yes, I can hit a target from 10 feet (3 meters) away
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Yes, I can hit a target from as far as 15 meters (50 feet)
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Do you consider yourself a thankful person, %%FIRST%%?
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Yes
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No
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Not thankful enough
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Are there any children or elderly people you are currently responsible to take care of? 
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Yes
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No
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Will you be responsible for children or the elderly during said apocalypse?
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Definitely yes
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Possibly yes
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Definitely no
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How do you feel about cannibalism in dire circumstances?
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I would eat someone I didn’t know personally
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I would commit cannibalism if it would keep me alive, and only with the permission of the person before they die
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I would commit cannibalism with a group only after we have made a pact to donate our bodies for the survival of one another
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I would rather not eat someone but I may end up eating someone
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I would never commit cannibalism. I would die rather than eat another human
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Do you have a close friend with a boat?
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Yes, I have a close friend with a boat
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No, but I have an acquintance with a boat
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No
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Do you have a close friend with a plane?
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Yes, I have a close friend with a plane
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I have an acquaintance who has a plane
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No, I don't know anyone with a plane.
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Next
How do you feel about euthanasia?
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Never kill people, even the weak
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You can kill someone who is life-dependant on machines
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You can kill someone who is going to die, to save them from pain
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You can kill someone who's injured if you need to eat them
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Do you have a dog?
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Yes. I own a Pitbull, Doberman, Rotweiller, Kangal, or other fighting/guard dog
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Yes, another large breed (not listed above)
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Yes, a medium or small breed
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No. I don’t have a dog
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Are you good at math?
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I love math. Bring on the equations!
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I’m good at math, but I don’t like it
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I’m terrible at math
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%%QUESTIONANSWERS%%
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Congratulations!
You WILL Survive an Apocalypse.
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You are the rocket-scientist of survivors.  Your preparedness, training, and empathy make you the ideal type of person to survive danger and disaster.

More than that, you are a person who thinks of others--a trait necessary in leaders to bring the world into a new normal after the apocalypse. We need more people like you if we are going to survive a world disaster.

Take a second and share to see if your friends will survive with you.

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Sadly, You Will Not Survive an Apocalypse.
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Unfortunately, when the world is against you, the weak do not survive. Your lack of preparedness, limited abilities, and naive character suggest you will have difficulty surviving a worldwide disaster. The priorities you've shown up to now in life suggest that surviving an apocalypse is not a value to you. If the danger were upon us, you would not be ready to face it.

But the good news is that today there is hope. You should begin actually preparing yourself to be the kind of person who survives an apocalypse.

Take a second and share to see if your friends will survive. (Or try again...there are many paths: weigh your answers carefully and you may yet find you make it!)

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It's a Toss-up. You will "Probably" Survive an Apocalypse.
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While you are not the ideal survivor, you have enough positive strengths that suggest you may possibly survive an apocalypse. You have some preparedness, some abilities, and enough interpersonal skills that hint at your possibly skimming by during a worldwide disaster.

But then again, they might not be enough. Surviving requires a balance of self-preservation and thought for others--because, ultimately, being the KIND of person others want to help contributes to your ultimate survival. You should focus on preparing yourself for disaster, honing your skills, developing your compassion for others.

Take a second and share to see if your friends will survive. (Or try again...there are many paths: weigh your answers carefully and you may yet discover that you truly make it!)

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